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Are You Ready For More?

When is surviving the worst life has to offer a a bitter pill that you are swallowing every day? Do you get up and put one foot in front of the other yet in your heart you don’t care if you move at all?  Are you not giving up because of you kids, a parent, your pets? We go through massive life changing challenges and we live to see another day but in reality we’re not living.  We’re existing.  And sometimes that’s as good at it gets.  There were many days after my husband died that I just wanted the pain to end.  I remembered though that I had an elderly mother to care.  Then she died.  I moved on to making my life about caring for my pets. I wouldn’t want to leave them to someone else to care for.  They are my responsibility and I want them to be safe.  At one point I remember thinking that I wanted my life to be over but not until my pets had all passed. It was at that moment I realized I was living to die. When Jack was going through his cancer treatment I use to joke that I’d gained every pound he lost.  Of course he couldn’t afford to lose them and I sure didn’t need to gain them.  After he passed I…