There Will Always Be Those Times

Try as we will to be stronger, more resilient, happier and focused on our blessings we all have times when we’re not. We do our best to keep our focus on the positive but we’re human and far from perfect at anything we do.

What do you do when that wave of pain sneaks up behind you and crashes over your head?  What do you do when you can’t get to a positive place?

I’ve  been writing about this journey of crashing waves for nearly 9 years.  My thought has always been that if I share the worst life has given me and live to write another day then perhaps someone reading it will realize they can get through whatever they are going through too.

I’ve lost the big job, my financial security and my husband to cancer.  But I’m still here and doing the best that I can.  I’m not living the life I would prefer to but I’m doing fine.  There isn’t a day though that goes by that I don’t miss talking to Jack. I miss his voice, his laugh, my hand in his.  And there are times when no matter how much I try to rise above my pain I can’t.  Do you know the feeling?

We do our best but its important that we when we can’t get to a better place that we be OK with where we are. There will always be those times when something happens and the sneaker wave crashes over our heads.  We will get back up.  We always do.  But for a moment we are going to allow ourselves to stay in the place of our pain.

When we’ve suffered a devastating loss that has us questioning our purpose, our future and sometimes even our existence its not about being dramatic.  It’s about losing everything we held dear and trying to figure out what we do without it… or them. It takes time to ride the wave to a better place and sometimes we just need to allow it to carry us home.

It’s not about giving up or giving in it’s about taking the time to be Ok.   Every emotion we feel tells us something about ourselves.  We need this time to take it all in until we understand what we needed to learn. We need to allow ourselves to heal again.

With every wave we learn how to deal with the next one.  They make us stronger, wiser and yes more resilient.  Most of all they remind us that we are human and entitled to feel what we feel until we can feel something differently.  And we will.

With love, Cheryl

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