What Age Are You In Your Heart?

IMG_0760Yesterday we were having a conversation with our friend Nina as we wrapped up our Key West Healthy Living Retreat. The conversation was about birthdays. Some people love them, some people dread them but most of us reflect a little deeper when there is a “zero” involved.

There might be some excitement about “20” as we feel we are “coming of age” but after that there is the intense feeling of time running out as we climb to 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, 90….

I wrote all those decades out because I have friends and clients in them all. And the ones at the top of the ladder look at the ones below as “kids”.

Yesterday as we spoke to Nina, Steve asked her, “How old are you in your heart?”  Without hesitation she said, “ In my 30’s.” Chronologically, she is older but in her heart she is as old as she feels.

Nina is retired from her first profession. She recently moved to an Island and changed her life dramatically. She reduced her stress, exercises her body, mind and soul regularly and now works with an attitude of love for life rather than working to find a life she loves.

Even with all this, she was having some issues with an upcoming birthday. It is understandable. Although our calendar and birthdays are man-made ways of categorizing time, they are milestones in our lives that give us cause for pause. In astrology, your birthday is considered your personal New Year. The sun is back to the place it was on the very day you were born and took your first breath. It is a great time, a natural time to pause and reflect.  It’s a time to ask yourself, “Where have I been and where am I going?”

Taking a little personal time each birthday to reflect and either set your course or reset your course, can make facing a “zero” year less intimidating. It can make facing any birthday less intimidating.  It is when we live in denial of time and the inevitable that we eventually “freak out”.

In Tantric Yoga Philosophy it is said that five things cause us suffering as humans: Ignorance, Ego, Attachment, Aversion and Fear of Death.

BINGO!!!  Birthdays can activate all of them if you think about it.

Ignorance – when we don’t know or acknowledge that we are more than our bodies and that our spark of divinity is eternal.

Ego- – when the fear of getting older is about loss of youth rather than the celebration of our new role as we become a wise elder.

Attachment— to our life.   Aversion— to its inevitable evolution—see Ego above.

Fear of Death- For many of us- this is the unspoken bogey man for sure. And that comes down to being afraid of the unknown.

Who knew birthdays had so much deep stuff buried beneath them. But they do.
We can help each other out with the “birthday dilemma”.

Never ask any one their age. Ask them how old they are in their hearts.

Do not send birthday greetings with tombstones or the color black as the most prominent feature. That doesn’t make anyone feel good.

Ask each other what “newness” we are adding to this phase of our life and what negative thoughts we are going to leave behind.

Celebrate what you have learned through your life and plan for the next adventure.

Take time to reflect on the goodness you have experienced and all the incredible people and experiences you have had and are still having.

Allow your self to be shining example of how to continue to Live Life Fully rather than merely just existing.

Our generations are the vanguard of change about living life fully and with as much meaning as we can handle. Most of us have the advantage of being able to work on raising Consciousness like no other generation before us.

Let’s encourage each other to live our life and forget our age.

Let’s raise each other up with each birthday milestone to see our lives as having purpose no matter what man-made number we are celebrating.

We can help and encourage each other the most by teaching through example as we experience and  express our lives fully through our heart as well as our head.

Happy Happy Birthday to us all.