Get Up On Your High Horse

Fotolia_19719715_Subscription_XXLWe all have a voice. A platform. A way of being able to help and serve others.  You might not think of yourself that way, but it is true.

Believe that you are touching people’s lives and making a difference every single day, in your own way. Whether you realize it, or meant to, or not.

Sometimes we share a personal experience, or a gentle observation about life. Sometimes we turn the mirror back around on someone with a grander, not-so-gentle outlook on another’s current situation.  All of these things, when meant to help and given with an intention of love, can make a positive difference in someone’s life.

This means that in your way, with your true self, you are being of service to the greater good of those whom you are connecting.  Never underestimate your power and ability to make a difference-to have an impact.

Know with certainty that sometimes you must stand from a higher vantage point in order to be able to offer this help.  Many of us fear that we will be seen as a know-it-all, or as standing in judgment of another.  But check in with yourself.  Remember that if your intention is pure and you aren’t standing in judgment, how another perceives it is none of your business.  You do the best you can, with the right frame of mind.

Don’t be afraid to show your true self and offer your personal wisdom.   We go through experiences in this life in order to learn. Sometimes that learning is not just valuable to our selves, but to those that you meet as well. You truly never know how sharing will touch someone and create a positive affect in another’s life. You serve the world by getting up on your high horse when you are not doing it from a place of authority or ego, but instead, a desire to offer something to make someone else’s experience seem a little lighter or clearer.

There are a couple rules of thumb that can help you get your message across in the most loving way. The first is to stop and remember, “Was I asked? Are they asking for my input?” Nothing comes across as being more “high and mighty” than putting in your two cents when it’s unsolicited.

Next ask, “What is my intention in offering this sage advice?” Is it with good intention, love, and gentle awareness? The gentle awareness piece can be key. Can you offer it gently without it coming across as rough, uncaring? Are you about to spit out your superior insights because you are thinking, “you can not really be this dumb?” Because if you are…I’d say take a step back, a deep breath, and mostly, REMAIN SILENT. This is not the time or emotional space to be doling out “how to’s” and “you should’s”.

Which actually brings up an extra side note. If what is about to come out of your mouth includes the phrase “you should” or “you shouldn’t”, I’d ask you to think twice. Should’s are often an indication of a personal perspective that is imposing on someone else’s ability to have their own perspective. It doesn’t mean that you are doing it maliciously, just know that there is often that energy associated with a “should”.

My final point is to go with your gut. As always, check in for a quick moment. Did you just recognize a flash of gloating that this person is coming to you with this particular problem for help? Does the response rolling around in your head make you feel a little tense or make your stomach turn? This could mean a couple things depending on how well you communicate on an emotional level, but you know yourself. So what does it mean for you?

Did a personal story pop into your mind as they were explaining their situation? For me, that’s always an indication that there is a nugget of wisdom in there that is probably beneficial for the other person. So tell your story, even if it isn’t exactly clear how it might relate to them. This is your “gut” talking.

Remember that knights in shining armor sit up on high horses. Being up on your high horse does not always have to have the negative connotation that we often associate it with. The knights were perched up there for a better, clearer line of sight. It offered them extra protection from the messiness that was down below. In this same way, your elevated view when guiding another may not be such a bad thing. It can be to their advantage.

So ride high my friends! You must go off bravely, sharing your wisdom and insight. You never know who may be in need of rescuing.

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